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Dear Mother and son watching Cinderella together (Sunday 19th April/ 3pm showing / Kirkstall Leeds, Row L)

My sister* found her husband wouldn’t go with her to watch Cinderella. Who could blame him? Disney, Fairy Tale, Prince Charming, Chick Flick! It doesn’t really scream ‘Target Audience: Northern lad in his thirties’. So she asked me, and even I wasn’t too excited about seeing it. We all know the story and I have […]

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Frogs, C$cks and Focks!

Our toddler decided to start talking at approximately two years and four months. It was quite a shock. We were worried about his limited vocabulary of ‘frog’ and ‘Dadda’ (not interchangeable) when we took a little trip to the country and one morning, out of literally nowhere he counted to ten! I’d like to take […]

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Minuscule moments off from being his mum

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My toddler loves his grandparents. What’s not to like? They pretty much let him get away with anything. They never tell him off, they don’t instil discipline, they give him lovely food (which he doesn’t have to eat if he doesn’t want to) they spend all their energy taking him to parks and he always […]

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10 Teaching Strategies That Can Help With Parenting

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I have been a teacher in adult education (to mostly teenagers) for over ten years and a parent to my little boy for over two. Both roles are a continuing struggle; a battle. You get very little thanks or recognition in either of them – and you never quite feel you’re excelling – most of […]

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Hell is a child friendly caravan park holiday -part 4 – The Grand Finale

Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3  We return home and swing open the caravan door to reveal two sights at our feet. One small bin with a dodgy, luminous orange, sweet and sour mess crawling out of the sides and a three time wrapped shady nappy laying next to it. Mother is slumped in […]

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Hell is a child friendly caravan park holiday – NOT a review. Part 3. Soft Play Satanic Pit

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I trust you are up to date with part 1 and part 2 – so I’ll begin, We are back in the old caravan; My mother, partner and toddler. I look at how many hours it is until toddler nap time. Quite a few. I put on CBeebies. Mother sits in the corner reading her […]

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Hell is a child friendly caravan park holiday – NOT a review. Part 2 (The Swim)

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I trust you have read part 1 so I’ll begin… The best time to try out that swimming pool we saw in the lovely promotional video is surely when it opens at 9.30am. Right? Because everyone else here will be either in bed, eating at the breakfast buffet, hungover or just out for the day on […]

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Hell is a child friendly caravan park holiday – NOT a review. Part 1.

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I hadn’t been to a child friendly/ family friendly caravan holiday park since I was a child myself. But the promotional video looked so promising: The smiley parents with their smiley children skipping along the beach in their khaki outfits, frolicking in the near empty soft play, splashing in the near empty swimming pool, playing […]

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An open ‘Shit I’m sorry (apology)’ to parents everywhere : I thought my child would be different

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I thought there were no shit children – only shite parents. I thought it was your fault. I thought being a parent was easy peasy and I would be amazing at it. I couldn’t understand why anyone would moan. I thought Stay at home parents had it the easiest. I imagined you all there, sipping tea […]