Ode to Alex Dyke and Nigel Farage

TEEHEE! look, she’s got boobies!
She’s got one of them brass-i-ere thingies.
under her school shirt – you can see the straps
Pull the back far back lads. Thwap!

PHWOAR! She’s developed early! Just look at her tits.
I’ve heard she’s admired by all the boys, she’s a real big hit.
whereas you darling, have got two eggs – fried.
with those empty bangers, how can you expect to keep a male satisfied?

JESUS! With knockers like that love, you’ll go far
Showing those fake Norks off will make you a star.
keep that waist tiny and be sure to pose
Big Bazookas will get you noticed – everybody knows.

DING DONG! You’ll easily attract a man sugar!
shake what your mamma gave ya! Celebrate them curves
wear a plunging neck line with bronzer
be a good little titty magnet for the perves

what exactly are you doing with those?
and what’s that thing attached?
put them away you ostentatious slut.
You’re making people feel uncomfortable.
not at all a good look
It’s just not natural
Keep them covered
have some respect
We all know you’ve got them!
just who are you trying to impress?

STOP. We’ve all had our fun
but enough is enough.


Ostentatious: characterised by or given to pretentious or conspicuous show in an attempt to impress others


If you like this post please come and find my new blog at http://www.mummyswritingdarling.co.uk

and you can find me on Facebook at Mummy’s Writing, Darling

Twitter : sivitersteph


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