Sssh… some days… being a stay at home mum is a piece of piss

I am all about the moaning! I love a whinge! I am the first to complain (well..I’m very good at tutting). And it is generally very accepted (in life, as well as blogging) to have a right old grump about parenting: How hard it is, how draining it is, how much sleep you don’t get, the list of negatives just roll off your tongue. No one ever has a pop at you for complaining about being a mum (so far).

A couple of Tuesdays ago; the day usually reserved for doom, gloom, laundry and self loathing (which I have just decided will be the title of my autobiography), I woke up in a good mood. Maybe it’s the change in the weather. I put on my new maternity clothes (getting out of my pyjamas is a major milestone). I got the toddler ready and we went out.

But just before I left the house I read a tweet from that woman. You know the woman. I won’t name drop her. The woman who likes to upset people – it’s her career now. I followed her after she swayed me briefly on Celebrity Big Brother. It read something like

Stay at home mum? This just means you’re unemployed.”

I read it a couple of times, unfollowed her and heaved the three of us out of the door.

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We went to the park just next to us. The sun was shining. The birds were singing. The flowers were in bloom. I watched my two year old stampede through the park, pushed him on the swings, lifted him up onto the slide. I then walked with him to our local collection of shops. I bought him two little cars. We walked to a local bar and he had the children’s fish and chips.

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I walked him half way home before he decided walking wasn’t for him anymore so I carried him the remaining half a mile. Once through the door he napped and I cleaned and caught up on TOWIE (don’t judge me!) I thought about the tweet again.

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The toddler woke up and we played together until Dad came home. Dinner time, bath time, story time, bed time. I sat down with my partner and he asked the usual:

“How was your day?” I shrugged ‘alright’. Not wanting to admit to him the truth:

that that Tuesday, that day – being a stay at home mum had been a piece of piss.

I never want to admit this to him – and it is an extremely rare occurrence – don’t get me wrong. But the day had been sublime. I felt organised, sun kissed, happy, stress free, a good mum, relaxed and accomplished. This doesn’t happen all the time. But it does, sometimes happen.

It reminded me of the summer when my son was only a few months old. I sat in the garden one day because we were experiencing a heat wave. My baby fell into a slumber in the shade. I poured myself a Gin and Tonic (just one) and I felt utterly at peace. My working partner returned home (sweating) and eyed me suspiciously, slightly angrily – I knew he was thinking

“I knew this stay at home mum gig was a piece of piss!”

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I threw the Gin in the paddling pool and started folding some washing off the line.

But – really, some days, being a stay at home mum is a piece of piss. And I’m admitting it. There.

Most days involve me pulling the covers over my head at least once and weeping silently or shutting myself in the bathroom for longer than it takes to do a wee and just shaking with frustration.

I honestly never felt worked up enough to respond to the tweet about me being “unemployed” – I could have written a post about how hard it is, how my Further Education Teacher’s pay doesn’t equal nursery fees plus travel, that I don’t receive any benefits (as I would if I was unemployed) but I don’t feel strongly enough about it. About her.

What I do feel is content – pleased, grateful and lucky that I am able to have these years at home with my son and also blessed that some days (at least 1 out of 34) are a piece of piss.

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ps. Post July I will have two children – and if you ever, ever insinuate that it is a ‘piece of piss’ or that I am ‘unemployed’ I will kill thee.

 

If you like this post please come and find me at my new blog – http://www.mummyswritingdarling.co.uk

and my Facebook page – Mummy’s Writing, Darling

Twitter – @sivitersteph

 

 

 

 

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13 thoughts on “Sssh… some days… being a stay at home mum is a piece of piss

  1. I’m with Twinderelmo!!

    I love this post! I love days like this, where everything goes right and no one ends up howling or tantruming or locking themselves in the bathroom. These are the best days. They really are easy! They are fab. I wish they were more frequent! Xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. From a very proud Auntie (currently in bed in a hotel in Donegal recovering from four nights of the Craic) I think you’re wonderful and love your words xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  3. You let out the secret! – you are so right, sometimes the stars align and a good day is had by all. I’m a sahm to a 4 yr old and a 14 month old: those days disappeared for a while but have had a few lately. I would NEVER admit this to my husband though!! Xxx from @mumaontheedge / mumaontheedge.blogspot.com

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Brilliant brilliant brilliant!
    But for goodness sake keep how easy it can be a secret, I like the g&t paddling pool touch, personally I would have necked it! Good luck with two it’s hell on earth and that’s speaking from experience of working full time which is so so much easier than looking after brat bags all day x

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I have been a stay at home mum and now my kids are looked after by a stay at home dad. Yup you get the occasional piece of piss day……..they are few and far between………being at work is much easier! That woman (I totally know who you mean) is just an idiot – if I ever see her in the local soft play (unlikely) I will revoke or family non-hitting policy and let my toddler loose on her. I spend at lot of my life feeling guilty about the tough life my husband has and wishing I could make things easier for her, I’m sure your husband feels the same way too.

    Liked by 1 person

    • They are definitely few and far between. In fact – I don’t think there has been an easy day since then. Especially as I’m now 7 months pregnant and every day is a struggle!! Serves me right for saying some days are a piece of piss!

      Liked by 1 person

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